Websites like ExpatFocus.com help others gain knowledge about the community, cost of living, and even neighbourhoods. Some of the best advice is from first hand experience. This website also has articles about expat living as well.
While most of our answers tend to be the same, we continue to learn more and more about ourselves through our expat living. We enjoy sharing that knowledge with others via our website, podcast, and expat websites.
Recently, our website was feature on ExpatFocus via an interview. Through this interview we are able to help other understand more about the country they are moving to, either by choice or through work. Continue reading about here…
Further down in the interview.
If you have more specific questions about our expat lives, our FunkTravels Podcast Episode032 and Episode033 answers most of them!
Currently, we are working to re-apply for our visas. Our 1 year visas are coming to a close, and we are submitting our visas to live in Turkey for another 2 years!
As I wrap up part 3 of our EXPAT YEARS Series, I share 10 things we have learn our first year as expats.
Try to stick with your original plan. (Which we did not do…)
Jason and I agreed before we moved that renting a furnished apartment would be the best option. We could potentially pay more for our home but save money the first year. It would give us time to make sure we were in the right location and look for a more permanent rental that we knew we really liked.
Having great neighbors is worth your apartment rent and location.
Brightside to #1 is our #2. One of the main reasons we love our place is our neighbors. It took a while to get connected with our neighbors, but it is worth all the effort in the world to have good relationships with them. Our neighbors have had us over for tea, invited me into their women’s group, brought us food after my surgery, and even watered my flowers while we were gone for 2 months this summer.
Humans are created to be in community, and while you may not need a large community, it is still important. Married 2.5 years when we moved, Jason and I were comfortable with just being with each other, but we both knew it was not healthy. Community brings a network of helpers and advisors that can support you. Community creates friendships which, while they can’t replace your best friends back ‘home’ it can help ease times of homesickness and loneliness. Lastly, community gives you belonging and identity which is crucial to thriving long term in another country. All is important when moving to another country.
When I moved to Istanbul, Turkey as a single gal, it was also the first time I moved outside of the U.S.A. I found that celebrating the little accomplishments helped me see growth. I would celebrate the number of months living in a city of 20 million people much like newlyweds celebrate each month of marriage until their first anniversary. Make a list of things you will have to learn, and check them off as you learn them. Or write down things you have learned since moving such as buying furniture, refilling your transportation card, or have the air conditioner fixed.
This is so important! Taking a break every once and awhile is good! We were in Turkey 4 months before heading out to Germany for Christmas. After moving, living in an airbnb for a month, buying furniture, fixing issues with our newly (yet not truly lived in) renovated apartment, starting language… needless to say, we were ready for a break! We actually left our apartment in the hands of a Turkish friend for one day after we left so the leaking roof could be replaced. A break was important and usually is needed in the first 4-6 months. So whether it is just outside the city or another country, get out of town for a bit and relax.
Reflect and evaluate
While celebrating and taking a break are both great things to do, one of the most helpful tip is to reflect. We reflect together every new year, sometimes over our anniversary celebration, and even when other friends ask us questions. If you are learning a language it is helpful to reflect on what works and doesn’t work, and especially what you have learned to see progress. Scheduling time reflect on your work, personal like and projects is more helpful than you think and can encourage you as you in times of need.
Unless you are an English speaker in an English speaking country, learning the local language is always a good choice. (Although I do hear France is brutally unkind about new french language learners).
Is it easy? NOT AT ALL. But have I found (the second time around, and with a longer term vision in mind) that the more I try to speak, the more others appreciate it.
Will it take time? ABSOLUTELY (that was more for myself). With other projects on the burner, Jason and I are working part-time to learn Turkish and it has been worth every hour.
Keep up at least 1 hobby that you loved back home
Sounds weird but this one little task can make a bad culture day look brighter and mellow out sadness. Like to play guitar? Bring yours or buy one as soon as you can. Enjoy crossstitching, bring your needles and threads. Love to run and exercise, join a gym. You will not regret investing into the hobbies that bring you joy.
Explore all the local food … and maybe even cook it
These Funks love trying new foods, and even though we had both lived here before, I have found there to be so many foods I had never tried. Food opens a whole different door into the culture and locals you are learning about it. Be adventurous, and order that food you don’t know how to pronounce. Try and then record it in a book and either note how great it was or wasn’t!
Your family and friends won’t forget you, but it usually looks different.
You may find it challenging to connect when you return, especially if they aren’t able to come visit you. However, they will still love you! Returning home could require some preparation on your part and you find learn more about that in our next EXPAT SERIES: Going Home.
“There is a puddle of water in here!” I gasped in horror at the floor of our extra bedroom. Just 1 month into our rental, our landlady was checking over some final projects on our apartment renovation when she randomly checked the extra room and discovered a layer of water. “This is not suppose to happen your first year living abroad…” I thought to myself.
I honestly don’t know why she checked that room, but I am so thankful we found the puddle of water on the floor upstairs. After a few hard rains in November, the newly replaced roof from summer was now failing the leakproof test. The room upstairs is not one that we use a lot just yet, but it is important that we fix the leak. Winter season is mostly rainy season for the Izmir area.
As November ended, we hoped and prayed our apartment neighbors along with our landlord could figure out a solution. Three weeks later and many confusing conversations… we finally learned that that section of the roof is our landlords responsibility and the warranty is not going to cover it. Our landlord disagreed about the timing and importance of fixing the roof and suggested a tarp be laid down to catch any water over the next two weeks that we would be gone on vacation. And a part of me was wishing we would have decided to be full-time travellers instead of full-time expats…
As new tenants, we politely but firmly requested the roof be repaired. We played the game of refusing to pay rent, deducing the cost from the rent for the repairs and paying ourselves, but in the end she did have the roof fixed and paid for it too. (We secretly may have had issues with figuring out the rental transfers via our bank, and it could have looked like we were not paying because of these problems.)
Two days before our two week departure for Germany and our Christmas market tour, 2 men lifted 4 steel beams up 6 floors via a rope on the side of our apartment to resupport the roof and I just prayed it wouldn’t rain until they finished. And one day before we left, the fixers told us they would need another day. One the day we departed, our Turkish tutor, who had helped up through the process, stayed at our home so that the men could finish the roof.
Thankfully, since returning, we have had no major issues!
As you can tell and much to our disappointment, living in another country has the same issues wherever you live. What makes them slightly more frustrating is figuring out how to solve them… what method they use, who can help you, what is a good price, and how to say it in another language. BUT just like living in your native country, living in another country brings lots of other fun adventures… going to the market, travelling because things are closer, and going to the seaside for a walk.
So in the spirit of reflecting, here are questions we have been asked about our first year living abroad:
What has been your favorite part?
Neighbors and friends – Little did we know that our neighbours would be this awesome! I have really been able to connect with the ladies in our building and in turn they have invited me into their home. Jason has been able to meet some men through a coffee shop he works at and an expat meeting we went to just once. Investing in the people around you is never an empty endeavour.
Neighborhood- We love where we live, the neighborhood, parks, seaside. The large weekly market is just 10 minutes walk; Starbucks is about 5 minutes. I run along the exercise path lined with the deep blue waters and parks with benches just 10 minutes from our apartment. Our neighborhood has multiple grocery stores, restaurants, and shops that have everything we could need. Hop in a taxi and the megamall is just 10 minutes away.
Travel is always a plus! While Turkey isn’t in the EU, it is still a popular destination for Europeans’ vacation. This in turn, makes inexpensive, frequent flights more available to major European cities!
What has been hard?
Yes, we have traveled a lot and I am sure it looks like it is perfect. Don’t let us fool you! It has been one of the harder parts of our marriage. Nothing has taught us how different the ‘Saver(Jason)’ and the ‘Adventurer’ are than when we travel. This actually extends into most of our marriage too. But we have also learned how to work together better because of it.
I struggled to find my balance and identity after working full-time at a university for 3 years. Jason and I had to find new systems for working and living too. Once we got use to that, it helped us manage our schedules better.
What does a day look like for you?
Daily life is fairly normal and what you would consider typical. Jason works most of the day just like he did back in the states. And just like back in the states, he works from home, or a coffee shop, breaks for lunch or turkish study time. He is generally more at ease with being by himself than I am.
When it comes to living in another country and culture, I have had to learn what works best for me, and some weeks I am still figuring it out. I will usually exercise, have Turkish lessons, study Turkish and do homework, write, photo edit, and visit neighbors or friends to practice my Turkish.
I have found friends through several paths. My closest friend here is German, and we met on a local Izmir facebook group! Through her I found the IWAI and those women continue to weave more and more connections throughout the city than I could ever hope for. Jason and I have made efforts to know our neighbors and meet people in our neighborhood. We also attended an Internations party one time, and from that Jason has continued to meet with the guys he met there.
‘You get a strange feeling when you leave a place, like you’ll not only miss the people you love, but you miss the person you are at this time and place because you’ll never be this way ever again.’ — Azar Nafasi
Instead of spending one more month in the states we stuck to our original departure date – determined to move overseas. We felt that delaying our move would make it harder to leave, and believe me, it was sad enough leaving family and friends behind. So 20 hours later with a very lengthy layover in the Chicago airport, we found our (very tired) selves on the sunny beaches of Rota, Spain.
Since then, these 2 people have….
Moved 8 bags via south Spain (listen here and here) to Madrid to fly one way to Turkey
Sailing Trip in TurkeyExploring Eski Foca, Turkey with new friends
And the truth? There have been MANY times I have regretted moving those first few months, especially while we were settling in.
BUT the great reality?
REGRETS and ‘second guessing’ are COMPLETELY NORMAL. And in all honesty, part of the deal. The disagreements between Jason and I about what and how much to buy, having to research and learn what to do here before you can make 5,000 decisions, deciding to budget high for travel although we had just moved, investing money into our language learning when it could be easier not to learn it at all, having to deal with having surgery in another country, the days where you don’t want to deal with culture or think about how every way you act.
Tears, sadness, loneliness, reflection, prayers (lots and lots of prayers), and choosing joy and happiness. I remember it is WORTH it. I remember how long we planned and dreamed for something like this. I remember the list of gratitudes I started in my prayer journal. I remember how sweet our neighbors, church, and friends are. I remember how far I have come for the ‘not so easy learner.’
I am SO VERY THANKFUL we made the move. The decisions, awkward start of friendships, and transitioning from one life to another have had even more happy moments to accompany them. We have walked through our Turkish friends’ wedding, sang songs in another language, loved on Turkish and expat kids that are not our nieces and nephews, and celebrated life with those around us!
Let’s start off with how much we all LOVE travel websites! The amazing photos, the adventurous spirits, new cultures, food, and scenery. Full time traveling SEEMS like it really has everything going for it.
In fact, as my husband and I were planning our move from the States to Turkey, I was convinced we could do it. I could not, however, convince him that it was a good idea as well.
Now almost a year into our move, we are settled in the sunny, 4 million large city of Izmir, and I could not be happier with choosing to settle in one location as an expat and then travel out from our cozy home.
Here are a few reasons we decided to be expats instead of full-time travellers:
1. WORK: Not everyone is made to work and travel full-time. Fortunately, if we wanted to, we have that option. But there are so many other international full-time jobs that provide a steady income, housing allowances, insurance, and vacation time. It’s truly the best of both worlds! Consider becoming a language tutor, teacher, tour guide, airline attendant, or find an international job location via your current company.
2. HOME BASE: Let’s face it, some of us are homebodies. We like our routine… our morning coffee in the same comfy chair with the same perfect blanket… ok, maybe I have found out from my now 3 international expat moves, that is just who I am. And there is no shame about it. From a work perspective, my husband does best when he has a routine and a home office to work from during the day. We do best as a couple when we know what is expected and how we can best help one another.
3. COMMUNITY: Since our families live in the states, finding closeness to people here in the local community is important to us. Our online community is a huge support, but we also find that it is so helpful and encouraging to have a local group of friends to depend on in a foreign country.
4. DEEPER CULTURAL IMMERSION: Cultural is my favorite reason to live somewhere else long term. There is so much I am learning now, almost 3 years into Turkish culture, that I am constantly surprised by the complexity of culture! Plus, cultures evolve and changes just like the people that comprise it. Watching it change from when I first lived here 8 years ago has been even more interesting!
5. SLOW TRAVEL: It’s funny that I wrote ‘slow travel’ because I am actually a fast traveller by nature, but my husband is the definition of a slow traveller. Meaning that when we plan a vacation, I know that we will take half the day to rest, read, and sleep for him and the other half to explore what we can for me. It usually means that we decide to stay longer in one place in order to truly experience all it has to offer. It also means that we may just go to 1 city instead of 5 cities in one week.
6. SANITY: While some people are great at moving, touring, transitioning and maintaining emotionally consistency, others need time to process. Whether you are single, traveling with a friend, or married, it takes work to make sure you are communicating well and are emotionally healthy. Staying in one place teaching you to reflect, adapt, change, and learn who you are in one culture, one country. You learn to thrive in a place you are not a native for longer than a few days/weeks. While it is hard, it is one of the biggest rewards!
From the few reasons listing above (and many long conversations we had before our move), we were able to really see who we are and not what we wanted to be. Our intentionally dreaming and reflecting made our lives as expats much easier and less stressful through the transition to internationally living. Hopefully, you will be able to do the same and make the best choice for you!
Which one are you?
Would you consider yourself more apt to being a full-time traveler or does expat living sound like it could be the better option for you?
